Path to Nibbana : part 10

Happy thoughts for others

Battaramulla
Siri Sudassanarama
sadaham senasuna
Ven. Dr. Mirisse Dhammika thero

A materialistic and egocentric life is characterized not only by an increase in wans but also by restlessness, showing itself in being over-busy and over-active and lacking in moderation and self-restraint. Metta, which promotes the well-being of al, naturally has to be built on such qualities of sober humanism as are reflected in having a few meaningful and select tasks which conduce to the maximum well-being of all concerned.

As Buddharakkhita realized, when one becomes “over-busy and over-active”, his mind is restless, and this state of mind is liable to generate anger and resentment. Therefore, by avoiding an over-busy and over-active life, and by following a “simple life” as an expression of metta, one reorients one’s outlook and conduct, especially in relation to our competitive, pleasure-seeking and money-minded world. A person of simple living can be gentle, yet efficient and effective, and has restraint over her sense-faculties; she is frugal, self-disciplined and exercises moderation. Mental cultivation through meta meditation allows for such a person to she is surrounded by a very materialistic world. Metta leads one to a simple and easily supported life. A person who has a complicated, ” overloaded” life may find it difficult to develop loving-kindness properly .

Metta is nota form of attachment in that it is not selfish love for another. When one loves others out of attachment, one is ultimately aiming at satisfying oneself. One is using others for one’s own satisfaction. This is not true metta. Metta is instead having happy thoughts for others, in a some-what detached manner, much as a doctor may compassionately help you without becoming emotionally involved with you: this state of mind is free from self-interested thoughts or self-satisfying thoughts. Such a doctor is full of compassion, and thoughts of safety for and happiness of the patient. When the mind reduces its selfish attachments towards worldly things, such a mind takes the opportunity to practice equanimity: the equal response to everything, by gradually reducing negative opinions or feelings such as dislike and conceit, as well as the attachment to a desired outcome. When one is attached to the result, what started out as metta may turn into calculated, avaricious thinking.

In practicing metta, it is not enough that one should behave in a good way. When one follows metta, his way of thinking should also change, especially regarding the welfare of others. When one’s mind becomes infused with true metta through sustained metta meditation, one thinks, perceives, feels, and of course, acts, in the mode of metta. Blow I summarize for further discussion the characteristics associated with metta:

(1) Non-hatred and the sharing of joy and happiness for all.

(2) on-hostility and the irradiating light of sympathy and empathy.

(3) Without using harsh words and with using wholesome speech.

(4) By restraining from destructive, anti-social behavior and by building harmony and friendliness.

(5) Without conceit and with equanimity.

Loving-kindness and compassion neutralize and disperse anger, hostility, conceit and destructive thoughts towards others, making it difficult for the latter to dwell in the mind. In other words, a mindset of metta forces out negative emotions and attitudes by actively putting into practice the correlative positive ones. It is only when one actively practices non-hatred and equanimity towards all beings that one can outgrow the tendency to entertain negative thoughts and emotions towards those who are disliked and perceived as a threat. However, one does not have to be fully free of negative thoughts in order to practice metta. Metta is used as a way to gradually reduce negative thoughts.